What do you need in order to be happy? Often, you might think “a new car” a “bigger house” or “a promotion at work”. These are things we are all programmed to strive towards, because that is a societal script that has been written for us and fed to us in movies, TVs, and in our education system. But everyone has something unique they want that not everyone else will want.
Everyone has something they need or want more than others. Your needs a reflection of what you want from your environment or workplace in order to be happy and effective in what you do. If you can properly understand your needs you can also create an environment that better reflects what you want.
Now, to understand your needs, you have to understand something about yourself. You have a natural set of personality traits and values that you actively strive to realise in the world. You could say your personality type is trying to save the world by using your dominant functions. But in order to do this, your personality type needs to be inspired. You need to be in the right mindset to make the world a better place.
What you see here is what an INFJ does in flow (top) and what an INFJ needs to be happy and to flow fully. (bottom)
What are your human needs?
The human needs are what we need to enter into a state of flow. These are not things that we possess or naturally exhibit but things that we require from the environment in order to be fully ourselves.
|To be stimulated and activated by your environment||For people to be open to your ideas and possibilities||For people to appreciate you for who you are||For people to give you an open structure you can play with|
|For people to listen to and hear what you are saying||For people to respect your opinions and beliefs||For people to trust your competence||For people to be open to your goals and projects|
The human needs are reflected by sometimes what we lack or need in order to be happy or effective.
|* I want to be listened to by the group|
* I want the tribe to see me for who I am
* I want to be accepted by society
|* I need people to have my back|
* I need my environment to involve me in what is happening
* I want to have a role or purpose to others
|* I want people to be open to my ideas|
* I need to be given space to do my own thing
* I need people to trust my capabilities
|* I want to have my needs respected|
* I need my talents to be appreciated
* I need people to respect my decisions
|Intuitive Feeling Types|
|Intuitive Thinking Types|
|* I want to be able to dream big without being shut down by others|
* I want people to work with me in realising my ideas
|* I need to be able to argue any side or viewpoint in a discussion without being judged by others for it|
* I want to be able to disagree with other people without having to argue with them
|Sensing Feeling Types|
|Sensing Thinking Types|
|* I need to feel that I can fit in|
* I want to have a role or purpose in a group
* I want people to like and appreciate what I do
|* I want people to respect my opinion if I say no or disagree with something|
* I want to have power and influence in my environment
Human needs theory can be used to help identify which personality types might make your best match.
What every personality needs to enter into a state of flow – if you can feed your type this, you will experience stronger and more consistent flow.
|INXX Types||Introverted iNtuitives need openness and curiosity from the world to formulate more original ideas.|
|ENXX Types||Extroverted iNtuitives are more creative and better at spotting patterns and creating opportunities when they hear original or unusual ideas and perspectives|
|ESXX Types||Extroverted Sensing types become more expressive when they feel listened to and correctly understood by others|
|ISXX Types||Introverted Sensing types remember intense or direct scenarios more vividly.|
|IXFX Types||Introverted Feeling respond better to moral or positive feedback than critical feedback.|
|EXFX Types||Extroverted Feeling types can be themselves more around people who are more easy-going, tolerant and forgiving.|
|EXTX Types||Extroverted Thinking Types respond better to critical feedback and questions.|
|IXTX Types||Introverted Thinking Types respond better to direct and tangible data or competitive environments|
|XXFP Types||Feeling Perceiving Types can be themselves more easily around caring or supportive individuals who have earned their loyalty|
|XXFJ Types||Feeling Judging types find it easier to give or be generous to people who are honest and sincere about what they need or want from them.|
|XXTJ Types||Thinking Judging types tend to provide better leadership and decision making around people that can troubleshoot their decisions and offer alternative opinions.|
|XXTP Types||Thinking Perceiving types have better discussions with people who have strong opinions and clear, well-built arguments.|
|XNXP Types||iNtuitive Perceiving types feel more creative around people who are focused and have a strong sense of vision|
|XNXJ Types||Intuitive Judging types tend to have more clear, elaborate visions in open-ended environments with many possibilities.|
|XSXJ Types||Sensing Judging types tend to feel more organised and disciplined in busy, active environments with a lot of things happening.|
|XSXP Types||Sensing Perceiving types tend to be more busy and active when other people can schedule and lay out clear rules for them on what to do.|
This is also why the mirror relationship tends to be a strong match and why we tend to favour certain partners in relationships.